At Greenchurch Legal, Gill Browne and Sheree Green act as deputy for over 160 men, women and children. Most have wonderful supportive families and friends, who, whilst not in a position to take on the role of deputy, provide incredible support and enrich the lives of their relatives in countless ways.
Sadly, some of our deputyship clients have no known or living family or friends, due to the passage of time or in some instances, where cognitive decline or other health issues have led to burnout or other relationship breakdown.
Dignity in death is our concern. The role of deputy ceases on death, and authority to deal with the funeral and the estate passes to the executors of a will (or next of kin, if there is no will). We work with the individual during their lifetime, to try and ensure a appropriate funeral plan is paid for and in place, and executors are appointed under a will, or a next of kin is located who will pick up the reins when the person has passed away.
Lily* was unbefriended and had been in psychiatric care for many years, and latterly in a nursing home. At Christmas time we sent parcels, of carefully selected gifts (a cushion with her initial, a soft toy) – items that she might enjoy but which could not injure a carer if thrown.
Lily died. She had a funeral plan, and we attempted to pass the baton to the executor in her will. After many weeks, with no progress in relation to registering her death or working with the funeral director to arrange the funeral, the executor advised they were renouncing their role.
Eventually, working with the funeral director and the care home, Lily’s death was registered, and her funeral could proceed. A minister came forward to take the service in his church, and then her burial (in accordance with her wishes). We always attend the funeral of our unbefriended deputyship clients. If there is no-one else willing to be involved, we help out with the arrangements, the order of service, and sharing information for the eulogy. Sometimes, together with the funeral director and officiant, we are the only people present. At other times, a member of staff from the care home also attends to pay their respects.
This was the send-off we anticipated for Lily.
Then we received lovely news from the funeral director. The minister’s congregation heard of Lily’s situation and decided that they would be her friends and family for her final journey. And they were. In their best clothes, they gave up their own time, to attend Lily’s funeral, to offer support and to say goodbye, simply as decent fellow human beings, to a lady that they had never met. Lily’s funeral service was a lovely, peaceful and personal gathering. Lily was then reunited with her late parents in their grave at their local cemetery.
Surprising and rather wonderful! We think Lily would have been rather pleased, and a little amused!
*Lily is not her real name
